The well...

     So many times over the past few weeks the idea that I will never be good enough have run through my head. Little things will happen and "see you messed that up, what else will you mess up, it's what you do you just mess up", and "no one will ever trust what you say because of your past". 

I fight this all the time....

      But last night... I love these little nuggets of love from God...
He reminded me of a conversation Jesus had with a woman at a well... A broken woman, not just any woman but one that had a scandalous past. One that came to the well in the middle of the day instead of the cool of the day. It seemed she wanted to get to the well with out it being so ... busy with so many people, maybe. 

     As I was reading along in John 4 it didn't take me long to hit a curious verse... 
John 4:4 "But He NEEDED to go through Samaria" (NKJV)
Four verses in and He lays it out. There was something going to happen there and Jesus didn't just feel like going or, think well it might be fun... He needed to go.... He was seeking someone out! 

     We pick up a few verses later where He is weary from His journey and He sat down by the well...
It just so happened... in verse 5 that a woman came to draw water, and Jesus asks her for some water...

     I love her reply... v9)... "How is that You, being a Jew, ask a drink from me, a Samaritan Woman?" ... This was just not normal behavior.  Hatred between Jews and Samaritans was fierce and long standing. Permanent walls of bitterness had been erected by both sides. By Jesus's day, the hostilities were so severe that the woman at the well was astonished that Jesus would even speak wit her. John says "Jews have no dealings with Samaritans". So not only was she a woman... but she was a Samaritan Woman... 

I can picture this woman kind of looking around to see if maybe he was looking for someone else, and she just missed them standing there... 
like ummm... are you feeling ok.... 
are you talking to me, kinds of looks and wondering. 

I know I would be.

     I love that Jesus doesn't seem to miss a beat or waste time... 10)... "if you knew the gift of God, and who it is who says to you, 'Give me a drink,' you would have asked Him, and he would have given you living water".  

Can we just take a moment, #1 I love that Jesus refers to Himself in the 3rd person. He is so personable, He is God and he is personable.  
#2 He just lays it all out there... no holds bar... boom there it is. 

Lets continue on .... 
As I read more I found myself chuckling... 

      She says (clearly still know idea about who He is, and I am sure at this point maybe a questioning look on her face, one eyebrow raised kind of look) in verse 11) "Sir, You have nothing to draw with, and the well is deep. Where then do You get that living water? 

*I kind of picture her leaning as she speaks this, still polite, but curious...

12)Are You greater than our father Jacob, who gave us the well, and drank from it himself, as well as his sons and his livestock?"

*I feel like she is totally name dropping here... and I kind of wonder if the politeness has all but left.... maybe?
Like straight forward... who do you think you are? 

     And Jesus... not missing a beat again.... answers... 
13)... "Whoever drinks of this water will thirst again, 14) but whoever drinks of the water that I shall give him will become in him a fountain of water springing up into everlasting life." *mic drop...

Then her answer is so wonderful....

15) "Sir, give me this water, that I may not thirst, nor come here to draw," 
Ya'll she wants to change... she doesn't want to come back. She wants to move forward. Not stay where the world tells her to be, but she wants to be someplace better. 

    She is one smart cookie, and that'ts the key isn't it... that we want something better then what we have. We want to change, we realize we need to change. We want that thirst quenching water.  

      As I read on I seen that she opened up and was honest with Jesus when he mentioned about her husband. Even though He already knows He wanted her to tell Him. 

    This to me is such a beautiful gesture. She could have lied, she clearly didn't know Him from anyone. However she was open and honest. Just like we should be, because even though He already knows He want's us to tell Him. He gives us a chance to repent, to show all our ugly past, He doesn't shame us, He listens as we pour out our hearts.

     Then in verse 23 He says... "But the hour is coming, and now is, when the true worshipers will worship the Father in spirit and truth; for the Father is seeking such to worship Him. 24) God is Spirit, and those who worship Him must worship in spirit and truth. 

     I love the grace and love our Father shows when He already knows, but He is seeking us out and wants to hear us.
He is seeking me out and wants to hear from me. This woman, broken, with a questionable past, single mom, who fails more then not, and He, the creator of everything is seeking me out, and wants to hear from me. 

     The story goes on to tell about how she realized who He was and runs back to the town full of people who says she is not good enough, who she would rather just draw her water with out them there. Who she actively avoids, and she runs back into town for them to know what happened.  

     She spreads the word of who she met, how much He knew of her, and how they all needed to come meet him. 
Verse 28) The woman then left her water pot, 
*she just left everything she came with... and ran...
went her way into the city, and said to the men, 29) "Come, see a Man who told me all the things that I ever did. could this be the Christ?" 30) Then they went out of the city and came to Him. 

     A broken woman, with a questionable past brought the people to meet Jesus. She had a voice. I wonder why they believed her? She was a woman first of all, and she had a past. Yet... they went with her, that's all that mattered.

And in verse 39) it says... And many of the Samaritans of that city believed in Him because of the word of the woman who testified, "He told me all that I ever did".

Her testimony made a difference. Her story was important. 

As you read on you see they asked, well urged, Him to stay and even more believed. 

     All because a woman with a sorted past talked to a man at a well in the middle of the day. She simply was looking for water, not a savior and wanted to avoid the people because they knew her. I just bet Jesus had a smile on His face as she walked up. She was probably trying to avoid eye contact with this strange guy sitting by the well. All the while He knew what was about to happen. Yeah He was smiling, He knew what was going down. 

She found a savior, and because of her testimony more lives where changed. 

      I wonder if as she ran back into town if she was thinking.... "they are never going to believe me, they will think I am crazy, who am I to talk to them..." but that didn't stop her. She told them anyway. 
We never find out her name, but her name wasn't important, her story was. 

      I found it so comforting to re read this story. To just get to know the Savior just a little more. 

     He would truly talk to anyone, at anytime. He was bold and maybe a little witty, the referring to Himself in the 3rd person. He was a gentleman, never shaming the woman for her past. Ever the teacher. Always seeking us out, listening to us, and loving us just exactly where we are even if its at a well in the middle of the day in order to avoid most of the people.

      I am so amazed by Jesus. Even after having such a hard time and the constant reassuring He is always there. He knows me, He knows who I was and the things that I did and yet, He said "I need to go there, to Mountain Home AR. because there is going to be someone there I need to speak with, she is going to need to hear me and know that she is loved, that I love her, that I have plans for her, and I will listen to her as she pours her heart out, so I will be there, I will remind her of who's she is, I will hold her up when she can't stand, and I will wipe away the tears rolling down her face". And faithfully He has been. Never with shame when I fail, always strong when I am not, my peace in the storm that life throws out. He is here, whispering... "You are mine, and you are loved."

      So even when I hear how much I fail, I am so grateful for the whispers of love from my Father. The little nuggets that call me back to the foundation, to The Word, that remind me that, even a broken, sinful woman can make a difference, because God is with me. 



      The beautiful thing is, He says that for all of us. For every single person. He is there for you. 

* John 4:1-42